Barrymore admits she can’t handle relationships

drewbarrymore_justinlong.jpgTwice-married Drew Barrymore, who battled drug and alcohol addiction as a child, admits that she’s lousy with relationships. She told OK! magazine: “I’ve never really understood how I should feel or behave in a relationship. I didn’t have the kind of childhood which would have given me any perspective on what a happy home life or relationship would feel like. My father was literally out of his mind and my mother was more like a friend. She’d take me out to clubs and I wound up feeling like part of this very unreal kind of world, although that was the only world I ever knew growing up.” Last July Barrymore ended a year-long relationship with her He’s Just Not That Into You co-star, Justin Long.

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Comments & Discussion

  1. Nancy • January 15, 2009 @ 3:57 PM

    thats a shame

  2. Dave • January 15, 2009 @ 4:24 PM

    How long is Drew going to blame her childhood for her problems? Seek professional help and stop blaming mommy and daddy even if they did do wrong. You’re an adult and as such must accept responsibility for your own actions.

  3. Nancy • January 15, 2009 @ 5:18 PM

    Totally agree Dave! She obviously knows ‘why’ she’s like this so, now she just needs to DO something about it…make change!!

  4. Anonymous • January 15, 2009 @ 7:22 PM

    easy to say hard to do i know people who tried so hard to recover for tough childhood its really hard on them

  5. vicki • January 15, 2009 @ 8:15 PM

    I’m not usually a fence-sitter but, in this case, I agree with ALL of you. I do think adults need to take ownership for their own behaviour and move on with their lives instead of constantly wallowing in childhood issues. However, I also think that’s WAY easier said than done. Personally, sometimes I feel strong and in total control and yet, other times, it seems like junk from the past is suffocating me. Maybe the answer is just to sympathize with people, no matter how they feel, instead of judging them…

    Sorry to be so wordy. This is a tough issue.

  6. Jo-Anne. • January 15, 2009 @ 9:32 PM

    well put, vicki
    p.s. you don’t mind that I don’t capitalize your name, do you? just asking…

  7. ke • January 16, 2009 @ 12:41 AM

    actually that was a jibe at you.

  8. Nancy • January 16, 2009 @ 12:10 PM

    Duh! Do you really think so, ke?? It’s a good thing you are around to explain things!! LMFAO.

  9. Lisa • January 16, 2009 @ 1:46 PM

    Come on,what happens to you as a child, doesn’t just go away.As you get older it manifests into the person you become. Drew’s mother was no mother at all and her father well he was an alcohoic, this is why she is what she is today, confused, she should have lived with her godfather Steven Spielberg, maybe she would have had a better perspective about loving relationships……..

  10. JJ • January 16, 2009 @ 2:03 PM

    I think Drew is doing just fine. She “battled” drug and alcohol use as a child (note the past tense). She brought herself out of that and as far as her problems with relationships, some people who grow up with both parents in the home have the same issues. She’s just identifying that she probably didn’t have the best environment to show her how to succeed in a relationship. It doesn’t mean she’s damaged.

  11. Anonamous • January 16, 2009 @ 2:24 PM

    Obviously the men in her life have either been not too loving or she has pushed them away when they got to close.
    I know that when I date women that some make the hair on the back of my neck raise and I know enough to run. When the right man comes he will show her the love she needs and will not let her push him away.

  12. Dawn • January 16, 2009 @ 3:50 PM

    U know reading these comments tells me that the people that spoke on her continually blaming her parents tells me u people had good childhood memories to go on. Thank God u did. But don’t speak on something u have No idea about.Thats wrong. Try living it then say the words it will not be the same words.

  13. IB • January 16, 2009 @ 4:12 PM

    I’m glad Drew has identified her problem, now she can work on fixing it.
    Alot of us didn’t have the “perfect family” or good role models of what a good relationship is. Her best bet is to hang out with someone like Speilberg who is in a solid loving relationship with family to see how that works. Working with a counselor or group at the same time on these old issues, will move her thinking and feelings to where she can pick someone right for her and keep it.

  14. Jo-Anne. • January 16, 2009 @ 4:55 PM

    Dawn, obviously you can relate more to a particular situation if you experienced the exaxct same kind of situation yourself firsthand. But it doesn’t mean because you did not experience something, you can’t have an opinion on it.

    I am sure many of us have had certain issues to deal with growing up, but I do think if those issues are seriously affecting or controlling your decisions in life, then it’s time to seek help. Laying entire blame on your parents and using that as your sole reason to excuse your current behaviour pattern, to me, is not accepting the fact you can and should start living in the present and quit drowning in your past.

    If each and every child grew up in a perfect household, do you think we’d have no alcoholism, abuse, relationship issues, to name but a few? Of course not. Yes, there is no perfect household and yes, we have difficult choices to make as adults. Some more so than others. No one is saying it’s not difficult to move on, we’re just saying it’s possible.

  15. tributegirl • January 16, 2009 @ 8:41 PM

    Gotta give Drew credit for fighting off a lot of demons in her life, and for recognizing and acknowledging something that she has a problem with. Hopefully she will be able to move forward with this in a positive way and learn how to be in a good relationship.

  16. Kim • January 16, 2009 @ 9:38 PM

    Who’s life is perfect? Not mine, and I refuse to let childhood problems effect who I am as an “adult”! Drew, who cares what you grew up in;you’r an adult and your responsible for your actions and decisions.
    Get a life!!!! If you cannot have relationships, look within.

  17. Anonymous • January 17, 2009 @ 1:48 AM

    kim theres a difference between not perfect life and rehab at 13 and trying to commit suicide at 14 everyone has problems and should try to deal with them but there are people with terrible childhoods that effect there lives so much that there not all to blame if you where practicly abondoned by your parents where into drugs and suicidle at 14 doen’t you think life would be a little tougher then usual?

  18. tributegirl • January 17, 2009 @ 11:55 AM

    Agreed, anonymous, and I believe that our childhoods shape us into the adults that we become. Look at a child who has been badly abused. Often they will become a child abuser once they are grown. Drew only saw a bad relationship in her parents, so it’s natural that she would have difficulty with her own adult relationships. But I congratulate her on being open minded enough to dig deep into her past and find out why she is the way she is, and now I’m hoping she will be smart enough to find out how to overcome all that and learn how to have a good adult relationship.
    And it doesn’t sound to me like Drew is blaming her parents for her problems, it just sounds like she is explaining why she has these difficulties.

  19. Nancy • January 17, 2009 @ 12:57 PM

    It would be good if she would get this all straightened out though…BEFORE she ends up pregnant!!

  20. Patricia • January 18, 2009 @ 6:31 AM

    You have to admire the fact that Drew can now admit that she just can’t do relationships.I feel sorry for her because she will end up very rich and so alone and that is no way to live. She’ll have man after man not allowing herself the luxury of getting close.
    She needs extensive counselling and maybe even then she might not ever get over it.

  21. mandee • January 19, 2009 @ 8:26 PM

    ok, well first of all, no one is in anyway implying that people who havent had a tough childhood, do not have the right to their own opinions. simply all that dawn meant, was exactly what she said. she said : anyone who has not had a tough childhood may not say the exact same things if they DID have a tough childhood. i have been through a lot of bad stuff in my life, not from my parents, but it still came out as a bad childhood because of it. if you HAVE trust issues, it does seem impossible to get over it. i am still not over stuff that happened to me 10 years ago. also, i think maybe drew is just feeling bad and like she needs to explain herself because shes famous. so, because she has no other idea why she cant seem to make a relationship work, shes pointing the blame on what has happened to her in the past. which im sure any NORMAL person would do if they were stuck in a problem and couldnt get out of it, and people were asking questions. but if she wasnt famous, do you think she would even be looking for an answer as to why she cant seem to stay in a relationship? i think shes brave and very smart for at least ADMITTING she has a problem. for most thats a very hard thing to do.

  22. Vicki • January 21, 2009 @ 5:09 PM

    You’re right about Drew being brave and smart… and so are you, Mandee. You acknowledge your own issues honestly and that takes huge courage.
    I’ve re-read your comment a few times. It touches my heart:)

  23. mandee • January 21, 2009 @ 11:45 PM

    thanks so much 🙂 i was thinking no one would even comment on it lol. everyone should be able to acknowledge their own issues and problems, even if just to themselves. theres not really any point in dwelling on all the bad thats happened to you, since everyone only lives such a short time. hope everything is well with you 🙂 take care

  24. Vicki • January 22, 2009 @ 3:41 PM

    Mandee, you remind me of a lot of the students I’ve had the pleasure to teach. You participate in discussions with eagerness and honesty, showing a sensitive and caring spirit. You’re absolutely right — we have to focus on the good stuff because our time here is so precious and limited. I’ve gone through some awful times, too, but the sun seems to keep shining through.
    Hope you’re well too, dear:)

  25. Alan • January 22, 2009 @ 4:56 PM

    Is it Vicki? Or vicki? Are you the same person? Because your last post was so damn funny, man! I totally get what you’re doing.

  26. Vicki • January 22, 2009 @ 11:31 PM

    Not always as careful with my capitals as I could be, so they’re probably both me. But what is your point, Alan? I’m not joking with Mandee and there isn’t anything to “get”. I’m not sure if you’re deliberately being hurtful, but mocking people for being compassionate is despicable.
    I just hope I’m misunderstanding you as clearly as you are misunderstanding me…

  27. Jo-Anne. • January 23, 2009 @ 9:50 AM

    I’m not sure what Alan’s point is at all, not clear there.

    But I have to say I have a real hard time finding compassion for someone who when adressing me referred to “my disfigured children.” Sorry, Vicki. I usually agree with your posts…

  28. Vicki • January 23, 2009 @ 5:33 PM

    No need to apologize, Jo. I’m gathering that there is history between some people on this site, since there have been multiple references to issues I don’t get. However, there have been a few terrific, extended discussions lately that have been singularly UNdisturbed by serious insults, so maybe there’s hope that some better relationships are gradually developing?

  29. Jo-Anne. • January 23, 2009 @ 6:23 PM

    I heartily agree Vicki, but referral to my children as “disfigured” is hardly a comment I can overlook. I am just not interested in maintaining any kind of website “relationship” with someone who thinks to spew this is acceptable.

    You, of course, like everyone on here, are free to do whatever you wish.

    the banter, yes, history goes back and forth, most of it harmless, annoying, for sure, but harmless. I have a lot of fun on this site and happy to say I find way more positive than negative on here. I really enjoy the majority of comments and when difference of opinions arise, it’s all good, save, as you say, serious insults surfacing.

  30. Nancy • January 23, 2009 @ 7:14 PM

    Oh my! Well, from what I recall Jo, you also put mandee and her parents down. I seem to also remember you saying something about my being a single parent and that my children would be better off with their abusive, drug addicted biological donor. Then you wonder why I won’t be nice to you when you think “to spew this is acceptable.” Yes, the 4 of us have been at each others throats for months but please, don’t make yourself out to be innocent in all of it, Jo-Anne…you are NO victim!

  31. Jo-Anne. • January 23, 2009 @ 7:26 PM

    never said that Nancy, and you know that.
    twisted words.
    I am confident my posts will reflect this.

  32. Nancy • January 23, 2009 @ 9:59 PM

    You’re in denial…great result

  33. mandee • January 24, 2009 @ 1:58 PM

    i knew it wouldnt be long until jo stuck her nose in a conversation where IT DIDNT BELONG. seriously, i realllly think SOMEONE needs to get a life and stop trying to stir up trouble. vicki, did it seem to you like you or i were talking to jo? because if not, what gives? its grown women like that, that make me wonder how bad things are going to get in the future when all of my generation grows up to be either exactly like them, or worse.

  34. Nancy • January 24, 2009 @ 4:36 PM

    Why are you confident your posts will reflect this? Did you archive already and find that Tribute deleted them? And no, I haven’t archived…going back that far for the likes of you…even with high speed, is just NOT WORTH IT! I remember what you said and I’m sure a few others remember too. Anyways, I don’t care to prove it to anyone, it doesn’t matter to me what people believe as long as I know the truth! You’re the one who has to live with the lie.

  35. mandee • January 24, 2009 @ 5:06 PM

    wow, who are you talking 2 nancy? lol i sure hope it wasnt me 😛

  36. Vicki • January 24, 2009 @ 8:51 PM

    I’m fine with Jo joining in, as the “open forum” set-up of these discussions can lead to a lot of lively debates. However, it feels to me like some of the banter becomes uncomfortably bitter at times, as if comments from certain people automatically trigger put-downs from others. Is a ceasefire possible? Nobody has to forgive or forget, but maybe just move on…

  37. tributegirl • January 24, 2009 @ 9:32 PM

    Sorry Vicki, but I really don’t think a ceasefire is going to happen anytime soon. It would be nice, I agree, but I just don’t see it happening.
    mandee, your two comments weren’t on there when I put my 6:39pm comment on, they must have gotten delayed or something I’m guessing. So no, Nancy wasn’t referring to you when she posted that, I know because your comment wasn’t there yet. Weird, but I’ve seen that happen before! I don’t know why that happens, but it sometimes causes a lot of confusion! I don’t think Nancy would say anything to you like that anyway, because even though you two didn’t see eye to eye at first, you both made up and let bygone’s be bygones.

  38. Nancy • January 24, 2009 @ 10:44 PM

    Nope, I wasn’t talking to you mandee. At least we can disagree on some of these topics without bashing each others families. I can’t see a ceasefire any time in the near future.

  39. mandee • January 25, 2009 @ 3:47 AM

    ok thanks for clearing that up. i completely agree, and like im sure ive said before, nothing would have been mentioned about jos family if she hadnt felt the need to talk bad about my parents, or you and your kids.

  40. Jo-Anne. • January 25, 2009 @ 10:19 PM

    I will join in “open forum” Vicki and do quite often, just not with these 3. (by choice)

    However, judging by the recent posts, I can see the direction they are taking, and I am not surprised, nor do I expect their comments to reflect accuracy.

    So, that being said, I look forward to continuing discussions with the many enjoyable people on this site.

  41. Becky • January 25, 2009 @ 11:41 PM

    Good for you Jo-Anne, you’re a class act. 🙂

  42. Nancy • January 26, 2009 @ 2:02 AM

    She sure is a “class act”!! LMAO.

  43. Nancy • January 26, 2009 @ 10:07 AM

    Oh, you must mean “lengthy unrelated to the storyline issues” that EVEN you (I’m not saying you alone though) have posted?

  44. Jo-Anne. • January 26, 2009 @ 10:21 AM

    it never ceases to amaze me how quick you’re onto my posts…ah ha! So, that was YOU I saw in aisle three Canadian Tire purchasing the Jo-Anne Alert Buzzer???

    just a little fun…

  45. mandee • January 26, 2009 @ 3:00 PM

    hmm, clearly we are now discussing MY personal issues that were brought up in this conversation i was once again, HAVING WITH VICKI. as far as im concerned, theres nothing wrong with my posts. i think every single post i ever made, was exactly what it should be. you always talk about things not related to the topic jo, so why accuse others of the same thing? seriously, dont bring me up, dont speak to or about me, and you and i will have no problems whatsoever. and you can feel free to not read my posts if they are too personal for you.

  46. Austin • January 27, 2009 @ 3:22 PM

    uhhh…Does anyone sleep on this board?
    It seems the posts are happening day and night 24/7. LOL
    the only way for a ceasefire is to infect each others’ computer with viruses, so no more internet access.
    And on Barrymore, yes it is true that childhood can screw up your life, since everyone should remember that the perception of the world is whatever the parents make it for the children and children lives in that point of view. To change this, the person must realize that whatever they can do to correct the perspective of life is when people wake up.

  47. Jo-Anne • January 27, 2009 @ 5:26 PM

    ha ha Austin, yeah, I imagine many stay up all night checking back on this board!!!

    I’m a shift worker, so my posts are all over the place…

  48. Nancy • January 27, 2009 @ 6:03 PM

    I agree with you Austin on the Drew Barrymore issue, that is why I said she needs to get her life straightened out before she ends up pregnant. Bringing a child into a mess like that definately wouldn’t solve anything. As for people staying up all night commenting on here, I don’t see many “all night” comments and maybe others work shifts too…??

  49. mandee • January 28, 2009 @ 12:15 AM

    i dont even get in from work til after 10pm, so yeah, mine are before or after work so they will be whenever i have the chance.

  50. Austin • January 29, 2009 @ 2:31 AM

    Also, i think that we should create a Facebook group to discuss these issues on there too. Since Facebook is the it thing these days. U guys should try it, if u didn’t already. Facebook is very addictive. I would imagine Tribune should set up their own page on there too. Then we can see who is who on the posts. LOL Like who is Nancy and who is Jo-anne. Hahaha
    Just an idea guys. By the way, I do enjoy reading your comments time to time.

  51. Nancy • January 29, 2009 @ 9:03 AM

    Oh please….don’t subject me to having to look at her….it’s bad enough listening/reading her rants! LOL

  52. Nancy • January 29, 2009 @ 9:09 AM

    Btw, you were posting pretty late huh? 😉

  53. Nancy • January 29, 2009 @ 9:11 AM

    Hahaha, just kidding! Because even though I added a smiley, “someone”, huh hum, will try to fry me for that comment!!

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